Crows and EAGLES!!

I heard this story about "Crows and eagles" (thank you Lawrence!) which reflected my situation in mdu. Pre-requisite that you should know the story. If you don't then the moral is given below...

If a crow hangs out with the eagles.. It would fly higher than the other crows. But then... If an eagle flies with the crows it flies at a very low altitude compared to its normal flight.

I am an EAGLE!! And I belong to the second situation. My version of the story... An eagle never fits in with the set of crows. It is always considered to be an outcast. Other crows make fun of it 'cause it cannot "kaw-kaw" like them. An eagle.. Being one of its kind in the group is always at the receiving end of any humiliation. It has no say... Cause no body would listen to it as it is an out cast. If questioned... "How would you know.... You are not a crow!!" During flight... It has to tag along with other crows. Now... It is again at the receiving end cause it is swift and agile where as the crows are not. So the crows start criticizing the flying style... Though more swifter and agile than a crow the eagle has to stick with the bunch of crows. It degrades its STANDARD in the attempt of adjusting. It gives up its speed and agility and tries to fly like a crow. If the eagle sticks for a long time.. It would forget that it is an eagle and start living like a crow.

Why did I give this version? This is my story out here. As I said.. I am unfortunately the EAGLE which has joined the ***** crows. All through my life in this place, everytime I tell a person (not many actually!!) about my pathetic condition here a common answer is obtained. You have to learn to adjust to this place da. I still don't get the meaning of getting adjusted. Do they want me to consider myself as a crow and fly like they do?

I have been behaving like a crow for 3 years now. What do I get??

He is a happy go lucky guy... He does not have any seriousness.. He just depends on his dad... If he can do it, anybody can... He is not interested in studies... He is not interested in anything...He does not know the abcd of electronics... He does not know the abc of anything that is useful... Boring? Where is the scapegoat?... He takes everything lightly. Say what ever you want, he wouldn't mind... Kill him and he shall not lift a single finger... He just talks a lot, no action... He is a gas bag... Make fun of him, he wouldn't say anything... You are asking him for doubts?? You must be crazy... Why are you asking him such a difficult question? Ask a 1st class kid instead! ................

In a sentence... Down troden, rodent, worth for nothing, scapegoat, punch bag, ass hole....

I am actually the opposite of the above. Rightly said... a wise man in a group of foolish people is considered a fool.

Was I always like this? Nope! No way. I was with the eagles first. Flying high above these bastards. Situations changed and I HAD to put up with these fucked up crows. But now, I am afraid. Have I forgotten how to fly high? Its been 3 years since I had spread my wing wide because I was adjusting with the fucked up bastards here. How can I be so foolish and dumb? How could I even think.. For a moment that they would consider me as their own. Why am I even trying to adjust??? What have I got by so called adjusting... NOTHING. I have just lost touch of flying high and touching the horizon. Is this what I wanted? All I wanted was company.. afterall I am a social animal. But I never dreamt I had to trade my IDENTITY instead.

It was hard to live two lives. One with the eagles... Where you were considered above equals and the other with the crows where you were considered below everything else. It was surely not easy... BUT WHY??

Now, I am sick and tired of doing that. I have lived a false life for long. I have been humiliated enough. I have been kicked around a lot. This MUST stop. There must be a period right here, RIGHT NOW!!!

I am not here to tell you when its going to end... Just that the transition has begun!!

Updates...

Exams done with lot of pain...

Screwed up vacation... Ended up spending more time in a bus, train and plane rather than at HYD!!

Placement training is one BIG pain in the ass...

Get feedback from "FRIENDS" about my attitude...

Get negative publicity...

People think I am a "happy go lucky guy" type guy...

Get more insulting and depressing feedbacks...

Messed up life for the past 3 years... and ppl think I am whole together different person...

Some serious thought and conclude "I AM AMONG A GROUP OF FUCKED UP BASTARDS...” i need to get out of this place asap... its having its effect on me.

I am still thinking...